To Give or to Want to Give (cont'd)

Reading your post, Marta, many ideas are rushing through my head. Here they are – very raw and unorganized:

Your refinance money is going to go to various individuals who will have worked for it (manually and/or selling you good and services via their businesses). They will feed their families with it, which in turn will sustain farmers, ranchers, and other industries out there… The money does not vanish into thin air. It circulates. It’s an efficient dignified system. And there’s something to be said about sweating for one’s dollar earned. Aren’t those transactions noble and efficient – dare I say even “godly”?

Yes I understand that part of the argument is about those individuals that cannot be part of the economic system…

Well, if there is a God, surely he knows if one really wants to give to charity or if one just does it because: (i) it’s the right thing to do; and/or (ii) feels guilt. But what is the goal here? Helping the “poor” (the end justifying the means)? Or personal brownie points?

I find charity tricky in many ways… for the recipient and the donor.

Charity should not be carried out with the only goal being to let go of one’s possessions or wealth. Its intent has to be goal-oriented, and it has got to be fulfilled for it to be worthwhile. If all it does is handing out a fish without teaching how to fish, there is really no point. Going ahead with it could then be called self-indulgence.

The power of intention. If the genuine intention is behind the gesture of giving, the result will have more impact. Not having the desire is quite alright.

I deeply feel giving has to fit in one’s circumstances just right. It has to flow effortlessly. It should not be agonizing, afflicting, harrowing, tormenting; if it is, then one becomes a liability to oneself and others. The whole thing becomes a hindrance, putting the individual at a disadvantage, or compromising what he/she is responsible for. It defeats the purpose. But what is the purpose? I am wondering if that is where the real debate lies.

Also, if keeping one’s earnings to oneself somehow motivates the individual to be even a better human being. Surely giving is not the only criteria to assess one’s goodness. How about it makes the person even more focused, in touch, reaching for quality all around? How about he/she spends (not give) it thoughtfully? Quality is sometimes expensive: quality food, quality education, quality time with one’s children, family, friends... when one surrounds oneself with quality, I am sure that person radiates it… and many benefit. By “thoughtfully,” I mean purposefully. For instance, instead of going to my regular haircuttery 5 minutes away and pay $20 for a haircut, I now go to my friend’s husband’s hair salon (45 minutes away) since I heard that the 2008 economic downturn cut his wages by two third. I now pay 3 times the price for a haircut. I do get a better haircut in the bargain as he is a true professional hairstylist (ha!)… so that is not charity per se, but I feel really good about it because it helps the receiver.

Anyway, to go back to what you were pondering about: wishing one could… I obviously don’t feel like that. At least not yet. Not that simply.